Moab looms large and interesting phone calls at the HQ

darkhorse racing headquarters, 4:00pm........

(the HQ private line rings)
HM "C-dubs we don't care what flavor scented bath oil you bring to moab...stop calling here..."

"umm, yes is this darkhorse racing HQ?"

HM "umm, yes. sorry about that we have been getting some nuisance calls lately...ummm from ummm well its a long story. how can i help you?"

"this is Sheriff John T Nofunn at the Moab county sheriffs department. we hear that you may be sending a crew out here for the 24hrs of moab?"

HM "yes sir, you are correct. umm, how did you get this number?"

"homeland security has it on speed dial after that incident with c-dubs in Baja. but well we like to run a quiet little town out here. its bad enough that these damn hippy mountain bikers have taken a likin to riding on our truck tracks but now they gotta have some sort of all night "race". sounds to me more like one of them weirdo freak retreats or something... banging drums, bonfires, and grown men hanging around without their pants on.... sickening...."

HM "umm, ok but why exactly are you calling..."

"let me cut right to the chase here son. we ain't gonna be puttin up with the same kind of tomfoolery that you can get away with down there in west virginia. we'll let you marry as many ladies as you like but we gotta draw the line....."

HM "umm, i'm sure our crew will be on their best behavior...."

"dont give me that crap. i got six boxes of files on one of your "team" members alone. damn son, and the fbi told me that they dont have it in their budget to photocopy their files on him. they said it would be cheaper to fly me to washington....let alone what the mexican. south african, and the pennsylvania authorities have told me."

HM "umm, well ok. umm..."

"you just tell them we will be waiting. we just finished a new underground wing at our county lock-up. it will be mighty nice for them......"

HM "umm, ok, I appreciate the call and all. umm, have a great day......."

"hey, el jefe, we might want to double the "incidental occurrences" ie bail fund, um check that may triple it!!!!!!!